Being a Mother is the best and the most beautiful thing in the world. But that doesn’t mean it is easy, as one of the biggest challenges a new mother face is sleepless nights because it is difficult to get babies to sleep. Melanie Darnell, a social media influencer, went viral when she shared her restless kids’ bedtime routine with the world. She filmed her night routine as a result of waking up tired every morning. Melanie couldn’t believe what she saw in the footage the following day. Read on to know her story:
Introducing Melanie Darnell
Melanie Darnell is an Instagram influencer with a page @fitmomma4three that has over 91.4k followers and counting. She describes herself as an “Active Mom of 3” who is dedicated to “Gentle Parenting,” raising a “Vegan Family,” and has a “Daily dose of movement.” She started her motherhood journey way before the sleeping video went viral.
A mother is not a stranger to sharing helpful parenting advice. We are to learn about a shocking revelation from her motherhood journey. Read on to know what happened:
Parenting Difficulties
Darnell, just like other mothers, has the whole mothering thing figured out, but that being said, she also has faced her fair share of ups and downs. After giving birth to her kids, Darnell did a great job of getting back to shape and inspiring her kids to enjoy and love healthy food. Her open and gentle approach to parenting made it clear that she’s a great mother, but there was one aspect of motherhood she struggled with, i.e., putting her kids to sleep.
Feeling worn-out
Followed by the birth of her 3rd child, Darnell could not get over the fact about how many mornings she would wake up feeling exhausted. No matter how early she went to bed or how many hours of sleep she got, Darnell would wake up the next morning feeling more tired than she already was the night before. She could not figure out why she was exhausted because she was getting enough sleep.
Ten Sleepless Months
After almost ten months of sleepless nights, Darnell realized that something wasn’t right and decided to figure out what was causing her sleep issues.
Darnell didn’t realize she was not alone in her struggle and shared on Instagram, “After ten months of waking up every morning feeling more tired than when I headed to bed, I was curious, what is happening.”
Losing Sleep
According to The National Sleep Foundation, most adults need around seven to nine hours of sleep a night. But, According to Sleep Junkie’s survey, parents of children under 18 months get much less sleep. 68% of the people surveyed received 10% of the sleep recommended once they had kids. The surprising bit is that majority of the parents of children under 18 months of children said they slept 5 to 6 hours a night.
What’s even more surprising is that most parents of children under 18 months said they slept between five to six hours a night.
Common Problem
It was a common issue for parents to have sleep deprivation, and Melanie Darnell was no different and was becoming a part of that troop. Even after waking up tired for almost a year, she thought sleep deprivation wasn’t a big deal and was overreacting. She recalled and told on Instagram, “When I roll over and tell my husband, ‘I literally got no sleep last night, was that actually the truth? No, I’m sure I’m being dramatic; it can’t actually be that bad…”
A Better Parent
Later, Darnell concluded that she was not being dramatic and needed to take things into her own hands if she wanted a change. If she wanted to be a better parent, she had to do something more than just get enough sleep.
It makes the day hard to function if you do not get enough sleep. Darnell wanted to get to the root of the problem and was willing to take extreme measures to find out what was causing her sleepless nights.
NEST Cam
Melanie Darnell couldn’t figure out what was causing her sleep troubles, so she turned to high-tech solutions. So, she decided to purchase a NEST Camera to film and figure out what happened during the night. It seemed like an easy plan, but the real shocker was when she watched the time-lapse video the next day. Darnell on Instagram explained, “As a self-science experiment and maybe visual justification for my dramatic statements of ‘literally’ not getting to sleep at night anymore, I duct-taped my NEST cam to the ceiling and let the night play out.”
Tough Balance
Regardless of what the NEST cam would say about her night struggles, one thing for sure was that Darnell would not change her priorities as a parent. It was important for her as a good mother to be a mother during the day and the night because she knew that parenting doesn’t end when the sun goes down.
Darnell explained, “You have two nighttime parenting goals (1) get sufficient rest yourself and (2) meet the nutritional and emotional needs of your child. It’s a tough balance.”
Going Viral
When Darnell saw the time-lapse video, it blew her mind, and she felt that the rest of the world needed to see it. She shared her video on YouTube titled “Why Moms Wake Up Tired | Brutally Honest Overnight Time-Lapse.”
The video went so viral that it got over 9 million views. In 24 hours, the 2-minute video received 800,000 views and 1,800 comments. The question was, why did millions of people watch it?
Harsh Reality
Melanie Darnell’s video became a viral sensation because it captured the harsh reality many mothers can relate to. You can see her twist and turn in her bed while her kids disturb her sleep in the video. She knew she wasn’t the only mother struggling with this issue. She wrote, “Rather than feeling isolated and exhausted, we can feel connected to the other tired mothers that are also awake.”
Tossing and Turning
Darnell’s Youtube video starts with her sleeping on her bed at 10 pm and getting her 10-month-old, Milo, at 11.20 pm to bed. The video showcased how they tossed and turned in the bed as the video progressed. However, she doesn’t seem to mind the disruption.
In the Instagram caption of the viral video, Darnell explained, “In those quiet, dark hours, the lack of distraction can actually [be] quite calming and refreshing. Baby’s needs tend to be simple: to be held and fed.”
Warriors of the night
Milo, Darnell’s 10-month-old child, wasn’t the only one joining her on the bed that sleepless night, but her daughter Olive too, wandered into her bedroom at 1 am while crying and waking up her mother.
The video showcased Darnell’s efforts, doing her best to look after the kids and holding them in her arms. It didn’t take a lot of time to calm Olive, so she went to tuck her back into bed by 1.30 am. After that, she returned to attend to Milo, but did the mother go back to sleep?
Back to Sleep?
After returning to her bedroom, Mellina Darnell tried her best to sleep, and it wasn’t easy. The entire night, Milo kept wiggling in the bed, switching through countless different positions and pulling his mother’s hair at one point.
By 6.20 am, Darnell was wide awake and didn’t need an alarm to wake up and start her day. Milo hit her face with his tiny hands that woke her up. She didn’t take long before getting prepared to start the next adventure – making breakfast for her kids.
Shared Experience
Darnell’s viral video was touching despite it being brutally honest. Although, it was heartwarming to watch her sleep beside Milo and look after him even in sleep.
She is aware that many mothers go through the same thing every night, and that’s why she decided to share her video with the world. Darnell wrote, “During these moments, let’s think of the other parents who are up with their babies at the same middle-of-the-night moment and take comfort in knowing together we share this experience.”
Difficult Time
It’s worth noting that Mellina Darnell filmed this video during a difficult time. Her husband, Paul, supported her with the parenting duties but traveled for work when the video was filmed.
With time, their son, Milo, got better at falling asleep independently, but not when the video was filmed. Darnell’s daughter, Olive, was suffering an ear infection which is probably why she woke up in the middle of the night to hop into bed with her mother.
Doing it Solo
Parenting solo can be quite a challenge. Darnell did so due to her husband’s job. Paul works as a professional stuntman, which keeps him away from home for extended periods while filming on location. But as time passed and children became older and independent, sleepless nights became less frequent. Although back in 2019, Darnell still needed help to take care of her kids, so she and her kids welcomed an au pair.
Not Just an Influencer
Mellina Darnell has many followers on Instagram, but she is much more than a regular social media influencer. Her posts are usually detailed and lengthy, as she loves and enjoys writing. Darnell channels her creativity through her blog, Fit Momma.
Writing isn’t the only thing she does, but she also shares product reviews and posts about fitness and nutrition. Darnell has written several e-books covering such subjects and offers courses for everyone who wants to learn more about nutrition.
In Her Own Words
The “About me” page on Darnell’s blog describes her as someone who enjoys creative home workouts and whipping up yummy vegan meals in her kitchen. Additionally, she tries to introduce her kids to the beauty of veganism and is willing to help everyone who wants to do the same.
Darnell wrote on her blog, “My passion is to help you achieve your fitness goals and simplify this whole plant-based eating thing, especially when it comes to raising vegan kids.”
Nine to Five
Besides being an influencer, Darnell also has a regular 9 to 5 job to help her provide for her family. She is a certified public accountant specializing in performing financial audits. Darnell rarely talks about it on her social media.
Like other mothers, she puts in a lot of effort to find a work-life balance and pride in her professional and personal accomplishments. Darnell strives to put together audit reports that would lead to new legislation, federal financial accountability, and increased transparency.
Not Permanent
Some people may interpret Mellina Darnell’s video as her way of complaining about the hardships of motherhood, but that was not her intention, as she was aware that what she was going through wasn’t permanent. Darnell wanted to share words of compassion and encouragement with other sleep-deprived moms.
She shared, “So, to all of the tired mothers out there, breathe in and breathe out. These days are INTENSE, but SHORT lived. Both you and baby will be sleeping more soundly before long.”
Sleeping Habits
Darnell’s viral video may have puzzled you due to her practice of co-sleeping with her kids, as most parents leave them in the crib. She explained on Instagram, “If I’ve learned anything in this parenting journey, each family is unique, we all do what works for us, that aligns with our values, and in the end, these practices create our family culture.” Darnell opted for a sleeping arrangement that made sense for her kids.
Unique Needs
Mellina Darnell posted the viral video in 2018, and a lot has changed since then. She shared her kids’ sleep needs as they got older on several Instagram posts. In 2020, Darnell said that her oldest kid, Sage, was sleeping independently. She mentioned how Olive spends most of her nights in her bed but needs more cuddles and songs at bedtime. The youngest kid, Milo, was getting used to sleeping solo and doing pretty well, but he had a habit of ending up in his parents’ room, especially their bed, at around 5 am.
Shared Room
Darnell revealed that all her kids were crashing in one room. The couple moved Olive and Sage into the same room, which was a great fit for the entire family.
As Milo was old enough to join them, they re-arranged the room for all three of them to stay. Apart from helping the kids sleep better, the arrangements were made to create special bonding moments.
Shared Room
Darnell revealed that all her kids were crashing in one room. The couple moved Olive and Sage into the same room, which was a great fit for the entire family.
As Milo was old enough to join them, they re-arranged the room for all three of them to stay. Apart from helping the kids sleep better, the arrangements were made to create special bonding moments.
